Things I had forgotten about living in Florida:
1) The water is so sulphuric that you have to keep your mouth closed in the shower, and your laundry smells like you washed it in brimstone.
2) The day after Thanksgiving is the start of hunting season. Do not be alarmed when you hear gunshots in your neighborhood.
3) Everybody on the local news channel looks deformed.
4) Football Is Life.
5) Bugs, reptiles, and birds are sizes generally associated with the Mesozaic Era.
6) My parents' response to the housing slump is to perform a voodoo ritual.
Man, I missed the South.
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